I Was the ‘Penis and Vagina’ Kid from the Arnold Schwarzenegger Comedy: An Interview.

The action icon is best known as an Hollywood heavyweight. However, during the peak of his blockbuster fame in the late 20th century, he also headlined several critically acclaimed comedies. Chief among them is Kindergarten Cop, which celebrates its 35-year mark this holiday season.

The Story and An Iconic Moment

In the 1990 movie, Schwarzenegger plays a tough police officer who poses as a schoolteacher to catch a killer. For much of the movie, the crime storyline acts as a loose framework for the star to have charming interactions with kids. Arguably the most famous features a student named Joseph, who spontaneously rises and states the former bodybuilder, “Males have a penis, females have a vagina.” Schwarzenegger replies icily, “Thanks for the tip.”

The boy behind the line was played by former young actor Miko Hughes. His career encompassed a notable part on Full House as the schoolyard menace to the child stars and the haunting part of the youngster who comes back in the screen translation of Stephen King’s Pet Sematary. He continues to act today, with several projects listed on his IMDb. He also engages with fans at fan conventions. Recently shared his experiences from the production 35 years later.

Behind the Scenes

Interviewer: First, how old were you when you filmed Kindergarten Cop?

Miko Hughes: My understanding is I was four. I was the smallest of all the kids on set.

Wow, I have no memory from being four. Do you remember anything from that time?

Yeah, a little bit. They're brief images. They're like mental photographs.

Do you recall how you were cast in Kindergarten Cop?

My family, especially my mother would bring me to auditions. Frequently it was like a cattle call. There'd be a room full of young actors and we'd all patiently queue, go into the room, be in there less than five minutes, read a small part they wanted and then leave. My parents would coach me on the dialogue and then, when I became literate, that was some of the first material I was reading.

Do you have a specific memory of meeting Arnold? What was your take on him?

He was incredibly nice. He was fun. He was pleasant, which I guess isn't too surprising. It would be strange if he was a dick to all the kids in the classroom, that surely wouldn't foster a productive set. He was great to work with.

“It would have been odd if he was mean to all the kids in the classroom.”

I was aware he was a huge celebrity because my family informed me, but I had not actually watched his movies. I knew the air around him — it was exciting — but he wasn't scary to me. He was simply playful and I just wanted to play with him when he was available. He was busy, obviously, but he'd sometimes engage here and there, and we would hang off of his arms. He'd show his strength and we'd be holding on. He was exceptionally kind. He purchased for each child in the classroom a yellow cassette player, which at the time was like an iPhone. That was the coolest device, that funky old yellow cassette player. I played the Power Rangers soundtrack and the Ninja Turtles soundtrack for years on that thing on that thing. It wore out in time. I also have a real silver whistle. He had the coach whistle, and the kids all were gifted copies as well.

Do you remember your experience as being fun?

You know, it's amusing, that movie is such a landmark. It was such a big movie, and it was a wonderful time, and you would think, in retrospect, I would want my memories to be of collaborating with Schwarzenegger, working with [director] Ivan Reitman, traveling to Oregon, the production design, but my memories are of being a really picky eater at lunch. Like, they got everyone pizza, but I avoided pizza. All I would eat was the toppings only. Then, the original Game Boy was brand new. That was the big craze, and I was proficient. I was the youngest and some of the older kids would ask for my help to get past hard parts on games because I knew how, and I was really proud of that. So, it's all youthful anecdotes.

That Famous Quote

OK, the penis and vagina line, do you remember the context? Did you grasp the meaning?

At the time, I wasn't fully aware of what the word shocking meant, but I realized it got a reaction and it got a big laugh. I understood it was kind of something I shouldn't normally say, but I was given an exception in this case because it was humorous.

“It was a difficult decision for her.”

How it came about, according to family lore, was they didn't have specific roles. A few scenes were part of the original screenplay, but once they had the whole cast on the set, it was more of a collaboration, but they developed it during shooting and, I suppose the filmmakers came to my mom and said, "We have an idea. We want Miko to say this. Are you okay with this?" My mom didn't answer immediately. She said, "I need to consider this, I need time" and took a day or two. It was a tough call for her. She said she had doubts, but she felt it would likely become one of the most memorable lines from the movie and she was right.